Ex-PM Brown still the boss, as he sends wife to Tesco

By Cara Sulieman

AFTER his very public departure from high office, it was perhaps of little surprise that Gordon Brown would chose to keep a low profile on what was his first day back as a jobbing MP.

Back in his beloved Fife, at the North Queensferry home where his children no doubt were enthused as to how daddy suddenly had so much free time, the former Prime Minister stayed behind closed doors.

It was his wife Sarah, a rock to him these past few tumultuous days, who was to run the gauntlet of photographers, TV crews and reporters camped at the end of their driveway.

Susan Boyle yet to be asked to sing for Haiti

SuBo outside her home today

By Cara Sulieman

SCOTS singing star Susan Boyle is almost certain to be asked to take part in recording a Song for Haiti.

Showbiz reports across the globe were quick to say SuBo had already been signed up for the single which is being masterminded by her friend and mentor Simon Cowell.

But the superstar from West Lothian revealed today she was still to get a call to take part in the biggest fundraising record since Band Aid.

Today, just hours after the Britain’s Got Talent boss revealed he had been approached by the Prime Minister and promised to “make it happen”, Susan said she was still waiting on news.

Pastor Praises Gordon Brown in home town

By Andrea McCallum

A CHURCH leader from Gordon Brown’s home town has taken out an advert in his local paper to support the under-pressure PM in the upcoming election.

Reverend Joe Nwokoye insists the Fife-born Premier is the best candidate for the job.

And Dr Nwokoye – a pastor in Kirkcaldy – hopes to inspire Mr Brown’s home town voters.

George Bush top of the league for nonsensical comments

By Cara Sulieman

FORMER US President George W Bush has been declared the worst culprit for making nonsensical comments.

And he is the only person to have two appearances in the top ten of a poll carried out by Aviva insurance.

It was his infamous statement that “our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we,” that clinched him the top spot.

He is joined by Bill Clinton, Boris Johnson and Eric Cantona in a range of foolish statements that span more than 30 years.

Gordon Brown urged to get ahead on climate change

By Cara Sulieman

A GORDON Brown lookalike dressed as a life-guard hit a beach in the PM’s own back yard today (thurs) to send an SOS on climate change.

The giant headed doppelganger urged the real prime minister to become a ‘lifesaver’ ahead of the forthcoming climate conference in Copenhagen.

With 100 days until the talks – which aim to create a new deal to replace the Kyoto Protocol – campaigners from Oxfam gathered in Gordon Brown’s constituency to raise awareness of the issues at stake.