Rankin’s new book goes under the hammer

By Michael MacLeod

IAN Rankin is auctioning off the first four pages of his new book – three months before it hits the shelves.

The crime writing superstar offers a sneak peak into new novel “The Complaints” to the highest bidder in a charity auction.

The unique prize could fetch a criminal amount of cash for the Edinburgh writer’s local Samaritans branch, which celebrates its 50th anniversary this year.

But the Rebus author wasn’t overly precious about the manuscript, simply stuffing the pages in an envelope and relying on standard Royal Mail delivery to get it to the charity.

Sandi Thom swears like a punk rocker

By Michael MacLeod

HAVING claimed to be a “punk rocker” in her debut pop song, Scot songstress Sandi Thom has finally proven herself as a bit of a rebel.

The Banff singer has launched a filth-ridden tirade on her local newspaper’s music critic for having a dig at her dulcet tones.

Using the f-word 13 times, the hate filled rant, titled “Ode to Learmonth,” left her young fans stunned.

She was tipped over the edge by Aberdeen music reviewer Andrew Learmonth, who said he hated her “awful” music.

So in response, Thom penned, recorded and uploaded the expletive-packed song for fans to download for free from her website.

Proud Scots whisky lovers lose the glens

By Michael MacLeod

A NINE-year legal battle over the name of a Canadian whisky has ended in a bitter taste for the Scotch Whisky Association.

The Scot whisky watchdog was worried that Nova Scotia’s “Glen Breton” single malt would confuse drinkers into thinking it was made in Scotland.

They said the firm should drop the “Glen” part of their drink’s name and protested that by calling the drink “Scotch,” Scotland could lose out.

But the Supreme Court of Canada refused to hear the association’s appeal, giving the all-clear for Glenora Distillers to carry on as Canada’s only distillery.

Lauchie MacLean, Glenora’s president, said: “We take pride in having seen this fight through its final contest.”

Proclaimers’ spec-tacular stage-side fight

By Michael MacLeod

SINGING Scots twins The Proclaimers have revealed they once came close to blows after a gig.

Lenses went flying as the bespectacled duo fell out and had an offstage battle following a concert in Canada.

But siblings Craig and Charlie Reid, both 47, say it only took one beer for them to iron out their differences.

The “500 Miles” stars launch their new album, Notes and Rhymes, today (Monday) – the eighth of their career.

But they revealed in a weekend interview that they’ve not always been completely in harmony.

Film hunk Dougray Scott hates Botox

By Michael MacLeod

DASHING Dougray Scott says he will never get Botox and is “shocked and appalled” at his fellow male actors who have.

The Scots-born Hollywood hunk’s chiselled good looks have seen him grace blockbusters across the globe, having starred in Mission Impossible II and Desperate Housewives.

But the 43-year-old star says he’ll never change his appearance just to progress his career.

He slammed the number of vain actors who have gone under the needle to try and look better.

And Scott, once tipped to become the next James Bond, says women are under “obscene” pressure to maintain their youth under any circumstance.

He told a weekend interview: “See the amount of actors who have had Boxtox, it’s unbelievable.

Sweethearts reunited after 60 years

Ray Smith and Kathleen Kelly

By Cara Sulieman

A COUPLE who had a fleeting romance almost 60 years ago have reunited and plan to spend the rest of their lives together.

Ray Smith and Kathleen Kelly met on a ferry in their 20s, but split when he decided that he wouldn’t be able to support her.

But now they have been reunited after Ray, 79, placed an advert in a local newspaper and travelled to Penicuik to meet the girl he wished he’d married 58 years ago.

Ray is planning a move to Midlothian from his home in Peterborough after rekindling his love with sweetheart Kathleen.

Giant vacuum cleaner to be installed in Scotland’s most famous street

By ALEXANDER LAWRIE

CITY planners want to install a giant VACUUM CLEANER to keep Scotland’s most famous street free of rubbish.

Council leaders in Edinburgh say fitting the £25million vacuum-powered rubbish chute would keep Princes Street litter free and is one of a range of eco ideas being looked at.

The ambitious scheme would end street sweeping and see pipes laid underneath Princes Street to suck away rubbish from shops and offices at speeds of up to 50 mph.

The move is designed to try and cut the number of refuse lorries that service the Rose Street area, directly behind the historic thoroughfare.

And it is thought the scheme, which could cost upwards of £25 million to install, could take up to two years to complete.

Anorexic tortoise goes walkabout

By ALEXANDER LAWRIE

A WORRIED pet owner is hunting for her missing anorexic tortoise after it made a slow bolt for freedom six weeks ago.

Susie Agnew from Edinburgh is growing increasingly worried about 20-year-old Alfie – because the tiny tortoise hardly eats.

The fussy eater managed to squeeze under a garden gate and make his bid for freedom at the beginning of May.

Measuring a miniscule six inches Alfie has lived with Mrs Agnew, 57, for the past 18 years and has never been able to hibernate because of his anoxeria.

Last year, after a spell at the city’s Dick Vet hospital, Mrs Agnew was forced to feed Alfie with baby food through a tube just to keep him alive.

And recently the animal lover has been encouraging her poorly pet to eat by putting him under a heat lamp and giving him warm baths.

I downloaded child porn so fiancee would dump me, sick squaddie claims

By Paul Thornton

A PERVERT squaddie who was caught with child porn by his own fiancée claims he was using the images to make her dump him.

Former Scots Guard soldier Andre Dunn, 27, was turned in to cops by his own bride-to-be after she walked in on him stashing over 1,100 indecent pictures of children.

But after admitting the stash was his he claimed he WANTED her to catch him with the images because she had been abusive to him.

And at Edinburgh Sheriff Court Dunn – who served in the Scots Guards regiment for three years and guarded royalty as part of his duties – escaped a jail sentence and was given a three year probation order.

He was also placed on the sex offenders register for three years after he had earlier admitted possession of 1,109 indecent images of children, he also had 32 movies featuring child abuse.